the Lord's been graceful to me all these while. just thinking back on certain events that happened in the year. i felt so loved. loved in the way that he knows your every thought and feelings. esp when i'm pretty much still struggling with life's challenges. he's the only one that i love so dearly and i'm willing to offer my life to him as a living sacrifice to glorify his kingdom and his work. i wanna spread God's love to others.

today at prayer meeting. Jana said these words to me," God bless you my dear sister. Pray that with every guitar piece you're playing for God, you're winning one soul for Christ."

felt so encouraged. i know i havent been able to bring friends to church this year but i will perserve on. gonna spread the love!!!

i'm better now just that i didnt know i had so much to cry out. i'm glad i cried out to God, pouring out every single thing that's bothering me and feeling his love that is so real and personal when you accept him into your life. in a way, he's like the bestest friend u ever get. he died for you when you were still a sinner and what else, he knows everything about you. when all else fails, he's there!! in addition, when the whole world goes against you. he still loves you for who you are and his love never changes. =)

lord, i pray that you take away that small 'hope' in my heart . that is my hindrance to totally let go of how i feel for him. that hope caused me to question you so much and even accused you of playing out on me. Lord, i seek your forgiveness. Lord, i've been praying about him close to 2 years now. probably you did answer me , its just me not being able to hear your words. Lord i ask for a heart and ear that listens to you. Lord i really want to let go of how i feel. deep down i know things are impossible and its that small 'hope' that held me back. Lord, help me father , help me to overcome the issue. its not about him now, its just me, trying really hard to let go. i know God that you will be with me all this while and i ask for strength to overcome and live each day pleasing to you. Thank you Lord.
Amen.